Ups and Downs

I guess it is time for me to come out of hiding.  After the week I have had, though, it was nice to snuggle with the family and try to ignore everything going on around me.

There are bad weeks, and then there are weeks that you don’t even have adjectives for.  That would be what this past week was for me.

It all started out a week ago… on Valentine’s Day.  Miss C and I went grocery shopping.  While we were out, I picked up a box of two pregnancy tests.  My period was a week late, so I just wanted to check.  Both tests were positive, which were a bit of a surprise, but a very welcome surprise!  Hubs and I have been “not preventing” pregnancy since our last miscarriage last March, so I was very excited about this news!

I put the positive pregnancy tests in a ziploc bag and wrapped them up as a Valentine’s gift for Hubs.  I thought it would be a cute way to tell him.

He opened the gift when he got home, and all was happy and lovely.

Sunday morning we went to my parents’ house.  My nephew was over there, and we wanted Miss C to have some cousin time.  My sister, brother-in-law, and other nephew came over for lunch.  While we were there, we told them our news (everyone except the young nephews).  I planned to call my brother later in the day, as I knew he would be at church and I wanted to talk to him and not leave a message.  Hubs called his parents and texted his siblings to tell them the news as well.  It was all happy and rainbows for everyone at that time.

We left my parents’ house around 12:30 to get home and get the little missy down for a nap.  I went to the bathroom, and the spotting had already started.  Less than 24 hours after finding out I was pregnant, the bleeding was starting.  Of course I burst into tears and snuggled up with Hubs.  In my heart I knew what was going on, but part of me wanted to believe that I wasn’t miscarrying again (my 3rd time for those keeping track).

I decided I would call my doctor’s office in the morning (as I knew there was nothing that could be done for me at this point on a Sunday), and hopefully they would get me in to see what was going on.

This wasn’t the only part of my weekend that sucked… because at 3:00 in the morning Sunday night/Monday morning, Miss C woke up and threw up all over her crib.  This was our first experience with her throwing up.  She didn’t act like she didn’t feel well, but we knew something was going on.  We gave her a bath, threw her bedding and a menagerie of puke-soaked stuffed animals in the wash.  Then we all proceeded to stay up with the munchkin.  At this point I decided I would not be going to work, even though it was just a day of meetings.

We were up until 7:00 AM, when she finally decided she was tired and wanted to go back to bed.  We were all very excited by this, and the three of us promptly all fell asleep for a nap.

At 9:00 I woke up and went to the bathroom again.  The bleeding was heavier and at that point that I needed a pad.  It was also becoming bright red.  The reality of the situation was still not wanting to sink into my brain.  I called my doctor and left a message for a nurse to call us back.  She finally called us back at 10:00.  They would get me in for an ultrasound and go from there.

My wonderful mother came to our house to watch a sick Miss C while we went to the doctor.  I still showed positive on the pregnancy test, but the ultrasound showed nothing.  There was no sac, no fetal pole, nothing but an empty uterus.  The doctor I saw was not my usual midwife, but I loved her!  She explained that this was probably a chemical pregnancy.  (A chemical pregnancy is one in which the egg is fertilized but one of two things happen: it doesn’t implant, or it implants and just doesn’t grow.  The only proof of pregnancy is the chemical, hcg, that is released from the fertilized egg and causes a positive sign to show up on a pregnancy test.)  She was very optimistic and encouraging, though.  We went ahead and drew some blood to check my levels (progesterone, hcg, etc.).

Two days later I had to go back and have more blood drawn to see if my levels were going up or down.  Unfortunately they were going down.  This meant that for sure there was no pregnancy and no baby.  The bleeding continued for a few more days, and it is finally tapering off.  I go back to the doctor this coming Thursday for another blood draw.  This will check to make sure there is no hormone in my blood at all.  They want to do this because we would like to move forward with testing to see if we can figure out why I have had so many miscarriages.  If everything is clear next week, then we wait another 6 weeks, and I will have a full workup done.  Hopefully we will find some answers.

While all of this was happening, Miss C was still recovering from her stomach virus.  She is still not 100% yet, but today has been much better than the past few days.  Another fun piece of the story is that my mom got the stomach virus on Wednesday.  She was ok in the morning when she came to pick up Miss C, but by the end of the day, my dad had to bring the munchkin to me because my mom felt so bad.  Hubs ended up taking the day off work on Thursday so my mom could recover.  Luckily Mom is back to normal and was able to watch Miss C yesterday.

In the end, I know I have no real control over what happens in my life.  It is all up to God.  He has plans that I do not understand and may never understand.  What I do know is that I am beyond thankful to have the little family that I have now.  Yes, I want to expand our family.  Yes, I feel sad and somewhat bitter whenever I see yet another pregnancy announcement.  Yes, I feel anger when someone complains about a pregnancy symptom.  I would give anything to have another pregnancy.  But I am also over the moon grateful for the one beautiful little munchkin I already have.  I know many women out there who would give absolutely anything to be in my shoes.  I never want to take it for granted.

5 Frugal Things

At least once a week, Katy from The Non-Consumer Advocate makes a list of 5 frugal things that she did.  I liked that idea, so I thought I would give it a try.

1.  I brought leftovers for lunch 4 out of 5 days this week.  One of the days school served taco salad which I really enjoy.  I still had some money in my lunch account, so I had that on Thursday. The other 4 days, though, I brought leftovers!

2.  I spent nothing today at Kohl’s and got a candle holder and hoodie for Miss C.  Since we bought our TV from Kohl’s, I had $30 YestoYou rewards.  The candle holder was originally $49.99, but was on sale for half off.  Here is what it looks like.  It is currently on top of our cabinets in the kitchen.

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The hoodie was originally $16.00, but was on clearance for $3.20.  I guess when you use the rewards you don’t have to pay sales tax for whatever reason.  The total ended up being $28.19.  I still have $1.81 left, but don’t think I need anything at this point.

3.  I actually went to Target and (almost) only bought things on my list.  While I was there, I scanned each item to see if there were any discounts on the Cartwheel app for any of them.  And there was!  There was a 5% discount on some snack mix that Hubs and Miss C really like.  It saved me $0.25.  The hangers that I bought were also on sale and saved me $0.99.  The only thing I bought that wasn’t on my list was a group of Frozen bracelets for Miss C for Valentine’s Day.  They were $1.00 at the Dollar Spot.  I made sure to pay with our cash from our envelopes, so we were good to go!

4.  We had a very frugal lunch today!  We tend to eat the same things over and over for lunch (mac and cheese, grilled cheese, quesadillas, frozen pizza).  Today I thawed out and warmed up some rotisserie chicken that had been in the freezer for a little while.  I also had some potatoes in the pantry that needed used.  We had some mashed potatoes and gravy.  The only “new” item was a bag of corn that I bought at the store yesterday.  Everything else were things we already had on hand!

5.  Instead of buying Miss C new toys to play with outside on these few gorgeous days.  I have been bringing up some old play trucks that belonged to Hubs.  She loves playing with cars and trucks, and she was so excited to have “new” ones!

What frugal things have you done this week?

February

Oh how I love the beginning of a new month!  I just wish I could figure out how to harness this desire of wanting to make it the best month ever and hold onto that desire all month long.  I always start out so strong and then slowly taper off.  This month, though, I am starting off a little sick. 😦  Boo!  I woke up with a sore throat, congestion, and just feeling overall yucky I have gone through many tissues today, and it’s a good thing that I just stocked up on them on Friday.  Between Hubs and me, we seem to be going through them so quickly!

I am so lucky that Hubs did let me get a quick nap (or two) today.  It was exactly what I needed to get some energy and feel better!  I also took some Mucinex-D and have been chugging water.  I know those have helped big time too!

I don’t know what the weather is like in your neck of the woods, but it is just gross out.  Yesterday it rained all day long.  Today it has turned into snow, but it is just a coating of snow… no real accumulation.  All I know is that I will NOT be a happy camper if we don’t get a snow day this year!  The 10 day forecast doesn’t show any good chance of accumulating snow.

It has been a pretty low key day today.  Hubs did do some dishes this morning, but besides that, there has not been much else happening.

We are all still in our jammies, just vegging out for the day.  We are currently watching the Puppy Bowl and will start watching the Super Bowl soon.  It has been lovely to just relax and enjoy the day with the family.  Unfortunately I know I will have to do some lesson planning this evening, as I have nothing ready to go for next week.

I was really hoping to get a strong start on my February goals today, but I just haven’t been feeling up to doing much of anything.  I did get one goal completed yesterday (I know I got it done before February actually started, but the timing worked out perfectly).  I broke down and cut apart all the large cardboard boxes we had just hanging out in the guest room.  This included a treadmill box, microwave box, and large tv box.  My parents had taken Miss C to watch her cousin play basketball, so I was able to load up my car and take all the boxes to recycling.   It is so nice to walk by the guest room and not have it overtaken by boxes.

I did also get spreadsheets up and ready to go for our budget.  They took me quite a while to make considering I was starting from scratch, but once I did some research and found a few that had parts I liked, I was able to create them based on what I think will work for us.  I have the budget page with my projected budget and the actual budget, and I also have a tracking page for each month.  I went ahead and made copies for each month of the year.  Now I am excited to use them and see how they work for us.  Actually putting in all the data is always the hardest for me.

Well, I guess I should get ready to watch some football!  The pregame is on, the chili is in the crock pot, and the family is ready to have some fun!

How are you spending your Super Bowl Sunday?